Friends With Benefits

It’s pretty funny how people can perceive you personally as well as in business.

During my career I have met many individuals who simply were friendly under the notion of what they could get out of me or my firm professionally. After months and sometimes years of friendship certain things happen and you start to see the true colors of these people.

It becomes very clear when the pressure is turned up as to who is your friend, and who was simply occupying space with you to see what they could get out of you.

Personally, I prefer to work only with friends. We are a privately held firm and we need to align our cultures and beliefs with others, in order to develop that strong professional relationship.

It’s interesting how people crumble in the pressure cooker of life, and their true colors come out allowing you to see their true motivation.

To those of you that can’t handle the pressure cooker. Fuck you.

Stop Complaining!

If you can’t determine if you are this stupid after reading this, you likely are the problem with today’s society. Let’s just put that out there before you even bother to continue reading this.

While talking to some people today i hear varying opinions on all kinds of topics such as religion, politics, social status, and much more. Typically, I remain opinionated because of the fact that I really do not care what people think, so why the hell does it matter?

Anyways, over the past few years we have been friends with this couple who are a complete train wreck and their relationship is solely based upon desperation due to them having a mid-thirties mid-life crisis. The husband was a Marine and served on three tours in Iraq and overall is a great guy. He is a God loving, gun toting, tattooed bad-ass from the United States Military that serves our country for over a decade. On the other hand is his wife, the bitchy divorced mid-thirties girl who has done a diligent effort in letting her political views cloud her success in life and devour her every ounce of logic. Literally, the kind of girl that can’t keep herself out of drama, because she finds it necessary to inject her liberal ass opinion on every situation possible.

Stop! Before you get ass hurt and get on the political views bitch here listen up… I have friends that are gay, black, straight, liberal, conservative, democratic, republican, libertarian, etc. The problem is not the political view associated with the individual, it is how that individual respects OTHER’s personal and political views. If you have no respect for others to keep your whiny ass shut because of the conflict it will cause, then go fuck yourself sideways. You’re the problem with the world.

Now, back on topic! They have been married for 2 years and have been together for 3 in total. One of them in very self-motivated and determined to be successful in everything they do. The other one has this entitled view of society and views everyone like they can learn something from them. (Guess who is who!?)

Now, they are married and all of these personality characteristics are coming out of the woodwork and they keep complaining about each other. On a weekly basis we hear shit about how the wife is so down in the dumps and has some new issue, and some new drama, and some new problem to deal with. At the same time we hear about how the husband is successful, motivated, and is busting his ass working 12-14 hours a day to help support his family… All while it’s a chore for his wife to sit at her desk for a bitchy 5 hours per day reading emails and answering telephones.

At what point did these two think that their personal characteristics were compatible? You have one person who is very respectful of others political views, beliefs, and all around is a good person which does not stem from religion or political association. Then you have the other part of this relationship that is an opinionated bitch that feels the need to insert her opinion into every damn situation every because it’s her “right”… Everyone has rights, not everyone has respect.

If you are one of these people who is a newly-wed looking at your relationship going “What the fuck happened!?”… Maybe you should have taken a step back and taken the relationship for face value and not dug in any deeper. Maybe dig in a few times, but then don’t call her for two weeks. Whatev.

 

Don’t be a megaphone!

This applies to most people unfortunately. If this doesn’t apply to you, I personally applaud you and thank you for your logical service to society.

In a whirlwind of bullshit at one of our offices today I have an employee run up to me and say “Hey, we have a problem”… He states the problem which obviously cannot be shared with all of you, but the problem is small in the big scheme of things. Literally, the problem equates to somewhere in the neighborhood of a fraction of a percent.

So, I of course ask the logical questions of… 1. are we required to take part in this? 2. what is this needed for? 3. have you asked anyone else about this to see if it is actually needed?

As I ask these questions, I get blank stare in return. To all of them.

I say this as a business owner, problem solver, and more so than that, a logical person who doesn’t like bullshit.

Please make it a point when seeing a problem and complaining about it, to actually have a solution to the problem when you are bringing it up to someone. Think of how the person must feel when you’re bring a shit little problem to the table, but no solution.

Don’t me a megaphone and state the problems louder than necessary. What are you doing? What are you solving?

Be logical. Be thoughtful. Be proactive.

Be careful who you sh*t on!

In all aspects of life you will run into people not just once, but multiple times. Don’t ask why, but generally if you’ve seen someone once, there’s a very high likelihood that you’ll see them again. No matter if personal of professional, you will likely run into the same people later in life.

A great example of this, which is very relevant as of recently for me is a business partner we worked with in Los Angeles a few years back. My company had a large project out in Los Angeles, California with this project team that was comprised of about 5 individuals who were living out there permanently to finish up this start-up project they were working on. When working on these larger projects, you get pretty close to the people you’re working with because they are who you are with literally ALL day. I am not emphasizing when i say all day. You live in the same corporate housing, you eat at the same restaurants, you work on the same job site, it’s literally nuts. Over the 18 months we were on-site my partners and i got very close with the project team out there that we were working with. These guys were from ALL walks of life and all countries.

One thing i forgot to mention was the fact that these guys you are working with, are literally your weekend co-pilots. Lots of times it’s more of a pain in the butt to travel back home Friday after work, just to fly back on Monday morning or Sunday evening. More times than not we would end up staying in Los Angeles to play golf over the weekend and just goof around. We did toooons of dumb shit while out there. It was great.

Once our project was closed out we all shook hands and parted our ways like men do and haven’t spoken since.

(Fast forward 6 years)

My company is working on a project, and we hear our client is going to be bringing in a new internal project team for us to work with. We really don’t think anything of it because it’s a longstanding client of ours, and they’re just shifting chess pieces around essentially. Earlier this week my company was asked to come in for a meeting so we could meet the new project team that would be handling this project for us, and guess who walks through the door?

The same three guys we worked with back in Los Angeles for 18 months! As soon as we saw each other we all busted out laughing and exchanged hugs, laughs, etc. These were three guys that i thought i would NEVER see again in my entire life despite spending close to two years of our lives together. These are guys that literally, not only live on the other side of the country, but two of them live on the other side of the world. The likelihood of us seeing each other again was so slim, i never thought it would happen.

Now, we are working on this dream project with people that we have a GREAT professional and personal relationship with…

Goes to show you…. Almost a decade later… People remember you. They remember the good times. The bad times. They remember everything. Be careful who you shit on, and how you treat people. You never know when God’s going to put someone or something back into your life!