Business Meeting Cluster F*ck

While in a meeting with our business partners today i am sitting down at the conference room table waiting for everyone to get there for our meeting to begin. So far, it’s me and two other ladies from a company we have been working with for years. These are also ladies who i have known for about 17 years personally so it is very much a positive start to our meeting. As we are waiting, more people star coming into the conference room like lost cattle wearing suits. During this time i use the somewhat quiet time to reply to emails from my laptop and catch up on the stuff i have been missing while stuck in here.

As i am sitting there at the conference room table, quietly replying to my work emails, i abruptly get hit across the forehead with something. I look up and one of the ladies i have been sitting with is hugging someone who just walked in the door. I feel a slight sting on forehead… To realize that when she went to hug another one of our business partners who just walked in, her long stripper nails AND diamond ring scratched my forehead!

When i say scratch, i don’t mean just a small surface scratch that’s red and goes away in twenty minutes… This f*cker starts to bleed! Minutes before my meeting starts. Of course.

Now, start the meeting with blood gushing out of my forehead.

What! The! Fuck! SMH.

Don’t be a pig! (Quick Reminder)

After just completing a business meeting this morning it seems like society needs a friendly reminder on how the world works. A swift kick in the ass.

A long time ago i had a boss tell me this: “Hogs get fat, pigs get slaughtered”

Sure it’s a bit out there, but think about it. In business if you get lazy, you’re being a pig and you’re going to get slaughtered. In your personal relationships if you get lazy and stop showing that you care, you’re going to get slaughtered.

Wouldn’t you rather be a hog that gets strong every day by improving your skill set? Improving your productivity. Making more sales. Making more money. Honing your skills every day, in turn making your daily tasks easier and easier…. Just improving your life every single day?

Don’t be a jackass. No matter where you are in life, apply this to your life in as many areas as possible, as you can only benefit from it.

First Work Day of 2017

Most of us are in the same boat today. We are taking down Holiday decorations, and trying to get back into the swing of “real life”. Also known as WORK. 

Today, like many other days was a typical work day, but only worse. It was a Monday but on a Tuesday, which should never happen. We need to just skip all the way to the next week, and not muddy up the waters for the rest of the days. Plus it was the dreaded first day back to work and school for most families. While this day already had the odds stacked against it, let me tell you how the last 36 hours of our lives went. 

All Monday, hung-over from celebrating New Years. For no good reason as 2016 was a bastard of a year, and should have been given back.

Now, let me take you to 8PM where our daughter trips, falls, cuts her tongue open and we end up at the emergency room with a tongue that will not stop bleeding. Sounds bad right? Just wait.

Get home at around 11PM, and start getting ready for bed, everyone is getting settled in. Daughter jumps in our bed (she’s 4) at 11:30. For some reason when this girl sleeps, she is only comfortable if her feet are pressed against my throat or face. For those reasons, i sleep in the guest room. Not bad enough?

I get to sleep around 12:30PM, where i am awakened around 2AM by our 9 month, 110 pound, labrador retriever puppy who is selfishly raping a hot pink 4 ft stuffed unicorn in the upstairs hallway. This is his guilty pleasure. We would stop him, but he likes the big girls. So now, i am trying to wrestle a 4 ft tall soaking wet unicorn away from a horny 9 month old puppy, who doesn’t care that i have to get up at 5AM for work. I lock the unicorn in the closet for safe keeping, and go back to sleep. (Now 4AM)

Again, awaked by wimpers. From a baby. A labrador baby. Missing his girlfriend. At 4:45AM. Then I go to work.

With all this being said, after now returning home from the office exhausted and miserable, i can confidently say i love my life and love my family. If i didn’t i would have left these crazies a long long time ago!

 

 

Who and Why?

Like you read in our About Us, we are simply a group of buddies that all love life, and we hope to share our experiences with the world, as we have a pretty diverse group of friends with hilarious stories and amazing finds.

Let me start by telling you about myself. I am in my early thirties and run a large international communications company. I have an amazing wife and a daughter who is bossier beyond her years (the wife too for that matter). We live in an affluent suburb in Georgia where housewives and country clubs rule all.

Our group of friends include a very diverse bunch, some of which are public figures, professional athletes, so i will simply provide them with nick-names for the sake of not pissing any of them off.

  • Nasty D – Professional Golf Caddie
  • The Hof – Pro Baseball Player
  • Arthur – Legendary Golf Coach
  • Hakim – President & CEO
  • Sampson – Director of Sales for a  Major Pharma Company
  • Janny – Director of Human Resources for Fortune 500

These are the fools who will be contributing to this page, and sharing some fun insight into our lives including rare finds, our favorite gadgets, and some good f*cked up stories!